What Helps My Legs

Do I get angry?
Do I rail against MS?
Are you kidding? Yes!

It’s just that anger
Won’t make my legs walk better.
It might make them worse.

Upset doesn’t help.
It won’t heal myelin sheaths.
Optimism might.

Memories So Beautiful

Sometimes I feel joy
For no apparent reason.
Where did it come from?

At times quicksilver,
It may vanish as quickly
As it came to me.

It does not matter.
I can live on memories
So beautiful.

I Don't Like The Blues

Sometimes I am sad,
Overwhelmed by this disease.
The blues settle in.

I don’t like that place.
It’s not pleasant being there.
I leave when I can.

Yet it’s also fine
To allow myself to feel.
Numbness is not good.

I Still Want To Shine

I remind myself
That apart from my MS
I am still intact.

I still want to shine
With kindness, mercy, and love
To light up the world.

Bruised but not beaten,
I embrace my good person
Who now needs a hug.

Keeping It Real

Keeping it real means
I recognize my losses
And concede my pain.

Keeping it real means
I acknowledge my limits
While I set new goals.

Keeping it real means
I face what’s ahead of me
Clearly, but with hope.

Result of Crisis

I sometimes worry
If as result of crisis
MS will worsen.

Mostly fleeting fear.
I carry on despite it.
Can’t let it rule me.

Here I am today.
Can’t speak about tomorrow.
Won’t burden my brain.

Recovery Starts

Husband’s surgery
Went well yesterday, thank God.
Hand bones don’t rattle.

My chronic fatigue
Its blinding fog stayed with me.
Somehow made it through.

Recovery starts.
My caretaker is healing

One day at a time.

Oh Geez

Sighed oh geez as I
missed my high school reunion.
Took place this weekend.

Reviewed the pictures
posted on the school’s website.
Am I that old too?

They danced, laughed, hugged, smiled.
No reveal of my lameness.
That’s why I stayed home.

Caregiver Exchange

I have MS but
my caregiver broke his hand.
I am caregiver.

Marriage vows promised
in sickness, in health, rich, poor.
Partnership defined.

I am nurse and cook
dizzy, foot dragging, stumbling
A delicate act.

On a Challenging Day

It is Florida.
Sun likes to bake and sizzle.
AC is a must.

Got up this morning.
AC had choked, no cool air.
Repair is a must.

Costs time and a half
Can’t afford the weekend rates.
Must wait til Monday.

On A Good Day

Wake up, meditate
Visualize me running
Build up willpower.

Drink my health drink.
Frankincense and ningxia red
Nerve fibers are fed.

Write today’s haiku
Check out the blogosphere news
My morning routine.

**

Wash clothes and buy food.
Write next chapter of my book.
Read class assignment.

Go visit doctor
Ask to explain my MS.
He has no answer.

Ponder life’s meaning
Scratch my head in confusion.
Afternoon routine.

**

Sit down to dinner.
Enjoy our conversation
Then rise and clean up.

I hang upside down
do thirty stomach crunches
and twenty pull-ups.

Bike fifteen minutes
Glide ten while watching TV.
My evening routine.

We All Fight Battles

No one wants to hear
What is wrong with me today.
We all fight battles.

Mine might seem special.
They are only so to me.
Forgive my weakness.

It’s just that some times,
MS fear seems to trump joy.
My resolve falters.

Opportunity

The sun rose again.
Gives me opportunity
To define my life.

Do I laugh or cry?
Do I let MS rule me
Or reclaim my life?

I have a choice.
Which life to select for me.
Let me sing and smile.

Learning Bravery

If MS brings tears,
it’s okay, not cowardly.
I tell myself this.

Learning bravery.
MS grants many moments
to find it within.

I see the moments
but I am not always brave.
I let myself cry.