Leaving for a While

our reality
two seriously ill at home
a challenging time

a case of two halves
equaling less than a whole
life gets difficult

alternating both
care giving and receiving
we struggle badly

so we roll along
finding some joy where we can
not letting pain rule

but now my dear friends
I take a leave of absence
until stress lightens

The Happiness Formula

On my mind has been
what accounts for happiness,
how one can find it.

On my better days,
love and value are affirmed
through loved ones and work.

Researchers assert
service and compassion bring
happiness as well.

Redesign

Cleft from the mainstream,
I turned into The Other,
not quite a good fit.

Forced to reinvent
my roles and relationships,
I sought a new me.

Prompted to value
the transformation life brought,
I release the past.

A Broken Support System

I cling for support
to a broken link about
to snap off cleanly.

Rusty and flimsy,
my link still enables me
to think I am fine.

I look around me.
Are there other links to grasp?
None seem stress worthy.

A Resilient Spirit

It may well feel like
the ultimate betrayal
when your body fails.

Out the window goes
all the motivational
facile self-help spin.

A point will then come
when finding no sure way out,
you get creative.

If I Feel Low

gentle guitar chords
sing through the air of my grief
seeking to lift me

bell-like the notes ring
though cannot deny the truth
that tears can take wing

would that the music
helped me find the fulfillment
of early promise

Nonstop Rain

It keeps raining here
dismal and unrelenting
tiresome and taxing.

I should be grateful.
Nonstop drought could be much worse.
I miss the sun though.

I suspect I might
complain about too much heat
if no rain showed up.

There Somewhere



It does not take much

to remind me of losses

suffered and to come.

As an antidote,

I sift through layers of ash

for the uncharred gift.

Life’s light, joy, and hope

surely must be there somewhere.

I keep on searching.

Always Transforming

The icicles drip
steadily as the air warms.
Do they know their end?

With the sun rising,
icicles break off and fall,
a steady clatter.

Remnants on the ground
turn into ice or water,
always transforming.

Unable to Choose

 

Do I tell myself

disaster fast approaches

I must hunker down?

Do I cling instead

to searching for solutions

that might buy me time?

Hoping for the best,

I stiffen my back and hope.

I hide and fight both.

Walking

I stagger and fall.
Impaired equilibrium
makes me look tipsy.

Walking aides help me,
cane, rollator, and wheelchair.
I prefer walking.

I may resemble
a bumbling drunken sailor.
At least I can walk.

For Some of Us …

Isolation costs
access to warm affection,
loneliness imposed.

Deprivation brings
denial of love’s wellspring.
Emotions are numbed.

Weighed by loneliness,
how does one sustain spirit
to find a way out?

Sun Shower Surprise

Sun showers erupt
cooling and refreshing all
unexpectedly.

Nature will surprise
sometimes for good sometimes not
out of our control.

The glistening leaves
well satisfied broadcast smiles.
Maybe I can too.

The Truth of It

The future unknown,
though I strive to be upbeat
things can get scary.

I am now stable.
Given the alternative,
this is a good thing.

Yearning still remains
for a body that enjoys
full health and wellness.

Support Network

 

Family matters,

ensuring continuance,

also well being.

A support network

essential for survival

is the species norm.

Problems will arise

when what should be inherent

is in absentia.

If Preference Counts

 

My world assessment,

if limited to headlines,

would be dark indeed.

Darkness does exist,

history will remind us,

but light prevails too.

I would much rather

embrace life’s promise blindly

than get mired in gloom.

An Uneasy Balance

lawn mower rumble
lingering scent of cut grass
tidiness restored

whirring weed whacker
landscape principles honored
nature’s wildness trimmed

untrammeled nature
not always a benign force
uneasy balance

I Am Better but …

I fell once again.
The resulting concussion
sent me to ER.

Injury addressed,
I grasp how vulnerable
I am to more loss.

I negotiate
reality and hope’s link
fraught with much tension.
 

The Butterfly’s Gift

 

Graceful and nimble,
the butterfly glides by me
from leaf to blossom.

My unspoken plea,
please come sit on my shoulder,
remains unheeded.

I then feel grateful
for beauty displayed with ease
at no cost to me.

A Bereaved Mother Speaks

Bereavement etches
pain at still being around,
a survivor’s guilt.

How does one assuage
grief, disbelief and sadness
in a survivor?

Find the path to love
authentic and generous,
the truest honor.